When Children Lie …

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Remember that time as a child when you lied? Lol.

Everyone has told a lie as a child for one reason or the other and hmmn, some adults still do, like say e dey their blood!

What do you do when you realise your child has lied to you? How do you prevent future occurrence, encourage honesty and above all,  strengthen communication?

  1. Read between the lines – Try to find out what’s going on between the lies. There’s always a reason behind what they do.
  2. Consider the child’s age – When a 3-year old says @I amgoing to London tomorrow@, (s)he is not necessarily lying. The child is only expressing his/her own view probably as a result of something heard or watched. However, if an 8-year old denieis watching TV when (s)he was supposed to be doing  homework, you know that child is lying.
  3. Pay attention  to your child’s verbal and non-verbal expressions – Your child might say “I’m fine” when you ask “How are you, how was our day?” not in order to fool you or to cover up what is really going on, but because the feelings are too complicated and confusing to put into words. He doesn’t actually know what he is feeling, so “fine” may be the best he can muster in the moment. This is another reason why it is so important to pay attention to the many ways a child speaks his truth — facial expression or lack thereof, gestures, body posture, art, music, energy, etc.
  4. Lead by example – Children learn primarily by imitation. Try to be consistent with your integrity, and accurate in your language. If, for example, your child asks you to watch him play a role at a school function and you are not sure you can fulfill the wish, then say something like, “I will do my best to be there” or @please remind me again before then.
  5. Teach the value of telling the truth – Passing on values is a huge part of parenting. If you don’t do it, everything else will — peers, media, the internet, society. Speak openly with your child and be be honest and be a safe haven for your child.

Feel free to share and do not forget to drop your comments.

Cheers!

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